Why Coaching Truly Matters
Do you remember when you were a child and you felt like the whole world was your playground? When the sky’s the limit and you felt like nothing was impossible to do? That everything you did in this world truly mattered?
That’s the feeling I had while conversing with Crystal on a Friday afternoon
Crystal Hutson. A mother, a life coach, and the CEO of Company Works.
I was about to finish my shift for the day when she had asked me to chat with her. At first, I thought that our conversation was purely business, but then she asked me this question, “How can I support you?” and with those 5 words, you instantly feel the sincerity that the other person has for you.
Not many people can ask you that on their first meeting, wait no scratch that, not many strangers can ask you that during your first meeting.
Because that was Crystal for me at first, a stranger. Just my boss. Just the CEO of a company I’m working for, but after our conversation, she was so much more than that.
“For every one that I meet, I need to let them know and feel that they matter. You know, it matters to me, that people know that they matter and it matters to me that people know that they are loved by me. So if there is something to do, then I want to make sure it is done.”
When you talk to her, she makes sure that she is present in the conversation and actively listens to you. That there are no judgments in place. That the space she and you have is a place of love and authenticity. It doesn’t matter whether it’s the first time you meet, or if she knows or doesn’t know your story, she will truly listen to you, without judgments, and would make you feel loved and supported. To her, your being matters.
As newborns freshly out of the womb, most of us knew that we matter even with no sense of awareness. Our hunger cry was met with cuddling and breastfeeding and or bottle-feeding/formula. We caused more anguishes to our parents or caregiver when we cried because we could not enunciate our pain. Virtually no one received more attention than we did. And if we were the firstborn, our parents would sing our praises to whoever cared to listen. However, as we grow older, we become less and less the center of attention. As toddlers and teenagers, if we are too active or less active, we are met with the question, what is the matter with you?
Society starts to put restrictions and constraints on what we can do or not do, and our curiosity and inquisitiveness starved. Our inner being is progressively replaced; consequently, we become defaced and conformist. So we walk around as cynical human beings who have swallowed their originality and creativity. So when I heard Crystal say, “how can I support you?” The simplicity and genuine wording of her question transpose me back to my youth years when I wished to be seen for who I was. It sounded as if she gave me back my face. Here I was, after being a teacher for so many years, an innocent question with no more than 5 words seemed to tell me, I see you for who you are and I want you to become the better version of yourself.
This is when it dawned on me, that coaching doesn’t just mean training someone, no, not at all, it’s something more. Coaching means being accountable for the other person, encouraging them on their challenges, making them feel that they can surpass any trial coming their way, and yes, giving them access to their power, and feeling that they truly matter in this world.
Goal Setting
Relationship Coaching
Stress Management
Career Advice
“Why do coaching? Because coaching matters. And when it works it’s effective, that’s a good question. Why do I do this? Well, I do this because of love. I do this because I can listen. I know how to listen, and I know how to listen for what matters to people. When I know what matters to someone, then I can get into their world, and when I can get into their world, then they have been gotten. They get that I get them. They get that I am with them. They get that I love them. It becomes about the other person, because too often when people listen, they don’t make the conversation about you when it should be about them. Okay, so you know how you were little when you cried and your mother saw you cry so she picked you up and put you on her lap, and then she took you somewhere to calm you down. She walked you, she bounced you.
What is that? What do you call that? What did your mom do? Well, it’s because she saw you! She saw you hurt and she nurtured you because she loves you. That is what it means to be gotten. When someone brings you to a place where you feel you are being heard or listened to or felt that she got you. That is what being mattered feels like. It’s like being gotten and everybody wants to be gotten. Do you know? That’s why I do this because I know how to get people. So if there’s any gotten to be getting, I will be getting them. You know what I mean?”
I love how she defines ‘being gotten’. You could think that coaches like her, have this special ability of ‘getting’ people, making them feel that they truly matter, and not many people would exert a lot of time and effort in making other people feel that way.
Then that was when it occurred to me, coaching is not a profession, but a mission, a calling. It’s not just attending to your clients from 9 am- 5 pm then eventually going home afterward. It’s earnestly listening to them, nurturing them, touching their hearts and soul that leaves an impact on their very being. Coaching is contagious because as you touch one soul, you are also touching the many lives with whom that person has interacted.
That was what Crystal did. She coached people. Touching them and their lives. Empowering them to reach even greater heights, let them realize what they are truly capable of.
“I believe that anything that we want for ourselves in our lives is truly available to us. It is we, who have the power of creating our possibilities. When you see that possibility and that possibility calls you powerfully into your future, it is foolish to ignore it. So whatever you say, If we say it can be done, then it is done.”
If you feel like getting a little push I highly recommend contacting Crystal and her team at Company Works. She did not only empower me but she helped me empower the people around me, and that is truly important because you’ll never know, you could be that teeny tiny single spark of hope to someone who is on the verge of giving up.
Here at Company Works, we listen, and we get you where you are. We aim to transform lives by coaching people and their communities to commit to diversity and inclusion. If you feel you need help in empowering yourself and people in your organization
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